Under the Skin looks like…

July 16, 2014

Word up.

When I’m not trying to convince people that watching ”Zatoichi” would not be a waste of time, I dig modern non-testosterone fueled cinema. The kind where people somehow resolve their differences through words or worse vague symbolic gestures.

A few months back I had the pleasure of watching Under the Skin. (spoilers: it’s a mutha of a film). Looking at home video options, the UK steel book version using the original poster is especially nice looking.

Get rid of the reminder that the film features an Avengers
and you have got a purty cover

It just dawned on me now that I’ve seen this before. Dig the back of the Canadian steel book for Total Recall.


This a beautiful film too

The similarities do not end there!

Both films have the following

  • characters luring each other with sex
  • hostile aliens
  • characters who think they are in dreams
  • people with great physical deformities
  • people from another planet who disguise themself as women
  • Dig Total Recall‘s own Under the Skin moment:


    It’s obvious which film is superior


    The Expendables 2 Casting Chart

    August 5, 2011
    Travolta Album 1976 torrent
    John Travolta S/T album (1976)

    Whether this turns out to be real or not, Total Film seems to think Bulgarian studio heads know about Hollywood film casting plans. So when one mentions that former round-house-kicker and current internet joke Chuck Norris and Old Dogs star John Travolta have been name dropped to be in The Expendables sequel. This next statement could make you wonder why I even maintain this blog, but I was not terribly excited by the news of the first film as it gave me Wild Hogs vibes. That a film like that will make a lot of money by it’s casting for a certain audience, but the result could be of a questionable quality.

    I don’t know what was the last theatrical Chuck Norris film, but in comparison to Travolta, he’s a genuine action star despite being…wait, 71? Christ Chuck! Take it easy! But as for Travolta, outside the two John Woo films, I don’t really think of him as an action star. I decided to do a little math and brush up on who really belongs in a film that proclaims to have the ultimate action cast.

    Here’s what I found:


    No one could break 90%, but I was correct in my assumptions that John Travolta is no action star. A rough 10% of your filmography consists of action films.

    Then again, The Expendables films are not how many action films you’ve been in, but about how much machismo you can pull off. And all these guys can pull it off. Even Grandpa Chuck!

    So will Travolta hop aboard Stallone’s ensemble? Possibly. But a link on the sidebar of Total Film makes me think it could easily go the other way.

    Travolta Not in Expendables 2
    He’s talking about Hairspray 2, but this won’t help Total Film‘s case!

    Goodbye Blockbuster! and Bargain Bin Gold

    June 21, 2011

    As George Harrison says “All Things Must Pass”. This is the Blockbuster that was within walking distance from where I lived during my high school years. All the Blockbusters on the west side of Ottawa have been shut down and are selling off their entire stock. Sounds cool, right? But I remembered the fact that Blockbuster never had that much I wanted in the first place. Regardless, I did get some good items. But even the deals I got at blockbuster don’t match the deals I just dug up in a bargain bin at Zellers.

    Read the rest of this entry »


    Things that should not be happening

    May 1, 2011

    Since I’ve been busy with reviews, it’s time to play catch-up and take a look at what’s happening in action cinema that I’ve been somewhat ignoring (outside that things like Fast Five were released…but I can skip that for now unless someone wants to pay for my ticket.)

    First, noted Milkyway director/writer/producer Wai Ka-Fai has stated that after he finishes off his latest film projects that he may take a break from film making. The article goes on to say that Wai Ka Fai is obsessed with health and wants to pursue other interests. I’m curious to see how many other projects with Milkyway are lined up with him in the meantime. Do we have to wait for another 5 romantic comedies before we get another Exiled?

    Wai Ka-Fai’s contributions to Hong Kong action cinema have always been a bit overshadowed by his frequent collaborator Johnnie To, but it’s still sad to hear that the man who’s films seemed to get better and better with Running on Karma, Mad Detective and Vengeance would be stopping now. His latest collaboration between himself and Johnnie To is the romantic comedy Don’t Go Breaking My Heart which I thought was doing well in Hong Kong so this announcement of a break surprises me. I wish him well in any future work he’s planning. [Source]

    Next in the bad news folder is an old one, but let’s remind everyone about it. Keanu Reeves is not only starring in a film titled the 47 Ronin but Reeves is also trying to star and direct in his own martial arts film called Man Of Tai Chi that he wants to do in Chinese and English. Actors who want to be directors is not necessarily a bad thing and if it does not go well, they usually stop if it doesn’t pan out. Keanu says he would play a villain in the film so we at least won’t get another The Last Samurai-esque film. [Source]

    Last but not least, we have news on Terminator 5. This film will be directed by Justin Lin who is known for the last three Fast and the Furious films. Terminator 4 by McG looked more like a Judas Priest album cover than a Terminator film to me and the idea of Justin Lin taking this on does not fill me with hope for the franchise. Justin Lin and McG aren’t exactly James Cameron so I perhaps I’m setting my standards to high, but right now I’m seeing us count down the days until they start remaking these films from scratch with a new director. On what sounds like bright news, Arnie will be back in Terminator 5! Sounds great, until I read this…

    Terminator 5 News

    Blah! So why bother?! [Source]


    Schwarzenegger’s New Project

    April 5, 2011

    Arnold on his new cartoon

    Uhh…alright this already has a stupid title of “The Governator” but let’s give it an honest look and see what this is. How does one follow Collateral Damage? Let’s watch and see.

    Arnold Schwarzenegger Cartoon
    Right. I’m totally fine with this being an animated kids show.
    Just don’t make references to things kids don’t care abou…

    Larry King Cartoon
    Larry King? Did we enter the school of Red for retired old people?
    Or do kids sneak out of bed to watch him late at night?

    Governator Laser Pew Pew
    Well…uhh….wha? I’m getting some serious Captain Planet vibes here.

    Governator Matrix Parody
    And I’m done here. If Matrix parodies didn’t get overdone by 2001, than how about doing them with Arnold while the Black Eyed Peas are playing?

    I’m long grown out of watching shows intended for kids and I have no children of my own to watch this with. Even if I did, there’s better entertainment for them. I’d ignore this if it didn’t think it would last, but even Jackie Chan’s cartoon show lasted a whopping 5 seasons.

    Jackie Chan Adventures

    I wasn’t young enough to watch this either! But even the more mediocre films in Jackie’s filmography are far more entertaining for kids than this is! Stick with films and singing the theme songs to your films Jackie!